I feel so amazing! There is no other word to describe the natural high that comes from accomplishing something that has seemed so insurmountable for way too many years of my life.
It all started with a desire to break free. This is usually a happy-go-lucky, Jesus girl blog, but I feel led by the Father to go beyond the unspoken rules of blog etiquette and just be candid. Maybe this will help someone else. Maybe it will just help me. But, it must be shared. For as long as I could remember, I have wrestled with an addiction to sugar.
For many, that word "addiction" probably seems a little too strong, but it is what it is. No matter the emotion, I always turned to candy. In times of stress, I rushed to the store to buy candy. Happy moments needed to be celebrated with candy. Hot tamales were my reward for accomplishing goals and a necessary companion for Trina Tuesday, my weekly night out.
If I stepped out of the house for any reason, my first thought was, "It won't hurt to also pick up a box of hot tamales or tootsie rolls. I can also stop by Starbucks for a mocha frapp, or maybe the gas station for an orange soda."
I started hiding empty boxes in my purse. Sometimes, I would gulp it all down in my parked car in front of the store so I could throw it away and rid myself of the evidence. I was ashamed to face my family, even though they already knew.
The funny thing is, as strong as my craving was for these sugary items, I haven't even been able to taste them for at least a year now. I guess my taste buds were oversaturated from the constant overindulgence in sugar.
There is no other word for it, I was addicted to sugar.
This has cost me a great deal. I'll come back later and share more about the costs. See you then.