Last Night of 2014

I always thought the "one word for the New Year" thing was trendy and hokey, until out of nowhere, the Lord dropped one on me on the last day of 2013: "Live," as in the verb. Immediately, the scripture reference came .


John 10:10 ESV The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy.  I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.  


So, I was excited because it was just too weird and yet so promising, and I came up with all these plans and resolutions for what I thought He was referring to. Well, summer came and the resolutions didn't happen and I was feeling down. So, I stopped thinking about "Live" and moved on with my life. 

Last Saturday, as I was driving, the word came back to me and I saw clearly how God meant it when He said "Live." It was like a tape played and He recapped all the ways He has delivered me this year from my stinking thinking that has really held me back and had me bound for years, the issues He's resolved that were past their expiration dates, and the ways he has bound up and healed my emotional and spiritual wounds this year and set me on a new path to really live and live freely in, through, and for Him. 

The visual image I had as the tape played was of buckles popping open 

one 

by 

one 

as the images played and, of course, the praise began. 

So, yeah. 

I'm thankful and grateful to serve a faithful and loving God who stands by His word and promises. When the tape finished playing, He gave me a new word: Release. 

I'm not making any plans for it. 

I'm just going to wait and see what He's going to do in 2015 with that word. 

To God be the glory. 

Happy New Years. 

Changes

I started some changes back in September and I want to talk about the inspiration for those changes for a moment.  I was walking out of Lifeway when I saw these beautiful journals adorned with jewels and butterflies and I just had to stop and buy one.  They were on sale, too.  Can't beat that! I wanted to write my story and record my journey to wellness and, ultimately, hopefully to a sense of wholeness.

Here's the deal.  I'm 36 years old.  I've spent my entire adult life waiting to be something.  To be thin. Healthy. Happy. Successful.  Accepted. Capable.  Fill in the blank here.  You know, "Once I get skinny, I will ______."  Well, I that got me absolutely nowhere quickly and I stayed there for a very long time.

In September, I had a wake up call.  Some loved ones and dear friends are battling serious health issues.  They have shown me just how fleeting and precious life is and that we cannot take these bodies for granted.  I only get one life and I need to take care of it.  Also, I need to focus on what matters: God and family.  That's it.

There are lots of great things, but sometimes you have to pare down and focus on the majors. 

Most importantly, and I hate to say this, but I saw a common denominator in my research on some of the issues they are facing...being overweight.  Now, don't get me wrong.  There are other factors, but that was the glaring common denominator and the one thing that I share with all of them.

So, I've made up my mind.  I will be healthy.  I am praying for good health and long life.  However, if I want God to bless me with that, the least I can do is take care of what he's already given me.  Also, some things are hereditary, but if I happen to get any of these ailments, I don't want it to be because I didn't do my part.  That would be very hard to take.

So, in this beautiful journal, I've been recording my journey.  I'll share some of the excerpts here as I work out this growth thing.  Some things are just too personal, but I'll try to be as transparent as possible without hurting those who are near and dear to my heart.

It's time. I'm ready.

It's Been a While

It's been a while.  Life has changed.  I'm still here.  I wish I had a clearly marked road map for where this is going, but I don't.   I am here.  I am back.  I am ready to write.  Please stick around.  The most exciting road trips are the ones without a clear destination.  I hope we don't run out of gas because that's a whole 'nother story.  Never the less, take this joy ride with me.